haiz...dunno y...now beginning to think i really a loner liao...maybe kanna influenced by him...anyway...nowadays veri sad...think too many things happening liao bah..cannot sort of cope with the results or wat...i myself oso dunno y i liddat so leh..i dun expect anyone to noe oso...think since wed's napfa test i sad le...train so hard still fail..thanks to tt broad jump...keep jumping still cannot make it...i really train veri hard loh...n still liddat...really no comments liao...now left shuttle run...n think if i can dun go..i'll NOT GO!!take liao no help..still fail... den chem test leh..oso fail...study like for 6+ hrs loh...oso liddat..still cannot make it...den since thurs everytime i write wif my mech pencil...the lead will start breakin after a few mins/secs of writing...den when refilling it wif lead...the lead oso keep breakin...dunno wat it means sia...thinking too much again...haiz...hard to control...den today co recruitment...slack the whole day...lol...keep stayin in LL rm n play...nvm...den today forgot to tell jf not to bring the cd...cos i watched the MTV liao mah...nvm..tml return him...now dunno y...it seems that i starting to isolate myself again or wat...going back to square one again loh...haiz...den oso dunno suddenly dun feel like tokin to anyone...jus hope tt i can have some peace...think maybe bcos of relationships bah..i really cannot tahan tt stress loh!...always get frustrated by tis kind of thingie..so hard to control...if everyone can really say wat they realli feel..it'll be so much better...i dun need to sometimes even lie to myself n make myself accept everything...no matter how intolerable i mus continue to act as if it doesn't mind...eg. hiong poh keep forcin me to record to play canon jus for him to record in his hp...sian...but nvm...it's over le...can onli blame myself for giving in..den oso dunno y recently beginning to think of who i had met during this 17+ yrs in my life...i seem to noe alot of ppl..but onli a handful really make a diff in my life...den oso wonder wat i really had achieve in these yrs...n alot more oso...too many Ys le...cannot take it...sometimes think until head really feel like bursting...so many problems n qns all cannot answer n solve...harder than maths, phy, chem n gp!!!sometimes really feel some one or her can jus gif me a few slaps to wake myself up...i sometimes really hate to let my heart jus float ard...very painful...jus feel tt my feelings are being toyed...n as i said...even how intolerable...i stll mus tolerate...i dun want to like hurt anyone feelings...haiz...den now recently my back abit pain..my left arm oso...den everytime after running my arms will be numb...now think i go do work le...alot of stuff to do...think i will jus let myself concentrate on work n not think so much le...if not i will really die of depression...