Just finish my last prelim paper yesterday. Finally i thought that I can sleep soundly but no. My mind is still not yet asleep. And i woke up after lying on my bed for 5 mins, and start blogging now.
Everytime when I slp, my mind will not rest completely until a few moments later, how long? i'm not sure myself either. Anyway, I just chatted with a sec sch friend of mine and I realised that the things i learning now is far below the standard that his sch teaches.
Sometimes I really wonder what does this signifies to me. As for the first time, I'm not on the mainstream route for my education. Mainstream route as in PRI->SEC->JC/POLY->U....i'm sort of like lost when i receive my A lvl results in 2006 as I know i'm out of this track. Till now i still wondering if i made my right choice in going to JC but still...all this discussions seems useless to me now. But now my problem is I beginning to feel that my ability /calibre is reaching a limit soon.
Somehow I beginning to feel that I'm know little n little things as time passes. Alot of people around me seems so busy and stressed up and tied up to their own lives but i'm still very free.Also, after knowing that the degree i studying now seems useless as compared to local uni and professional qualification like ACCA, i beginning to wonder again if i made the right choice of taking up this degree. It seems so frustrating to find out that what i paid for and no matter how hard i studied for this, employers will always choose local uni grads, then ACCA, then the degree of my kind (DL). Everything seems meaningless to me. I'm wondering how will i survive in future. Am I a failure? I have so many questions stuck in my head that will only pop up when i'm slping and i can't remember. Am i having problems?? Feel so lost.
Think I go slp now. Maybe nx time I will write some more. It seems that wenqing's prediction thru my astrology chart is coming true somehow. I feel like abit ...jus feel weird...nothing much interest me now. maybe I just want someone who i can really trust.
Everytime when I slp, my mind will not rest completely until a few moments later, how long? i'm not sure myself either. Anyway, I just chatted with a sec sch friend of mine and I realised that the things i learning now is far below the standard that his sch teaches.
Sometimes I really wonder what does this signifies to me. As for the first time, I'm not on the mainstream route for my education. Mainstream route as in PRI->SEC->JC/POLY->U....i'm sort of like lost when i receive my A lvl results in 2006 as I know i'm out of this track. Till now i still wondering if i made my right choice in going to JC but still...all this discussions seems useless to me now. But now my problem is I beginning to feel that my ability /calibre is reaching a limit soon.
Somehow I beginning to feel that I'm know little n little things as time passes. Alot of people around me seems so busy and stressed up and tied up to their own lives but i'm still very free.Also, after knowing that the degree i studying now seems useless as compared to local uni and professional qualification like ACCA, i beginning to wonder again if i made the right choice of taking up this degree. It seems so frustrating to find out that what i paid for and no matter how hard i studied for this, employers will always choose local uni grads, then ACCA, then the degree of my kind (DL). Everything seems meaningless to me. I'm wondering how will i survive in future. Am I a failure? I have so many questions stuck in my head that will only pop up when i'm slping and i can't remember. Am i having problems?? Feel so lost.
Think I go slp now. Maybe nx time I will write some more. It seems that wenqing's prediction thru my astrology chart is coming true somehow. I feel like abit ...jus feel weird...nothing much interest me now. maybe I just want someone who i can really trust.
posted by chanjk at
2:43:00 am
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